Since college, I haven't had a guy that I could call a friend, the type of friend that would help me bury a body, so to speak. Having a guy that I could talk to about anything, do guy stuff with and generally hang out with is part of why I am doing what I'm doing.
In the past when ever I thought about talking to a guy I would always worry about saying or doing something that might be construed as being a "gay thing" and not developing a deep friendship with another guy. Since I've started down this road, anything that I might have been embarrassed about is generally what we do up front and center, so there is never going to be an awkward moment when a physical attraction to the male form is brought up between us as an awkward moment, its the reason that we've met in the first place.
Now; any friendship takes time and effort to develop, but having the time to sit around naked with a dude, while playing with my cock and it's as natural as if it were a socially acceptable and in public action, that's a good start.
i've been lucky. i have several great pals...ruggers with whom (until recently) i spent a lot of time nekid. they'd definitely bury bodies for me. but they were str8. thought i was too. yep...there was always that elephant in the room. so, do you mind if i get nekid and take a seat on your couch? i think i'd like to hang with you amtop. if you see anything you like, help urself. and if there's anything i can do for you...just ask.
ReplyDeletecheers!
I'm divorced, but when I was married, I was always connected to my wife's friends and really had no male friends of the kind you're talking about. No one to really be myself with. Since the divorce, I met a married guy online who fills the "best friend" shoes. We first met because of our closeted same sex attraction, but it soon became "friends first". We know each others' families now, have even traveled together. We go to sporting events together, as well as biking and camping. Nobody needs to know what we do in our private time. I know we're really lucky to have found each other. Lots of guys are missing that friend to friend relationship. I never knew I missed it until I finally found it.
ReplyDeleterugbysex, I have the couch warmed up, I'm going to need you to wear a jock and leather straps under a suit and tie, we can start from there.
ReplyDeleteAdam, You seem to have what I'm looking for, but I wonder if, in my search, that I find that and recognize it before looking some more.
I believe that men NEED (and many secretly crave) the company of men. Modern man is really conditioned to not show emotion and vunerability. It's almost two dimensional. When I was in Istanbul, Men walked around hand in hand, arms draped over shoulders, and kissed hello and goodbye. It was really interesting. In the 19th century, It was common for men to have "romantic friendships" with other men. Now, when I say "romantic", I don't mean sexual so much as intimate. An "intimate" friendship. The closest moderm man may come to this is the friendships formed by soldiers in wartime. Although, this is a subject that is still not really spoken of. I am 49 and a gay man. My most intimate friendships have been with straight, married men. Straight men are still the men that I connect with on an intimate level. I have not met many gay men that relate this way as it seems it is either sexually motivated or no interest at all. I am guilty of this as well. My best friend of many years died 2 years ago, of cancer at the age of 49. I had many gay friends through this friend. What has come to pass is that I don't really want to be friends with them, they all deplete my emotional energy. This friend and I agreed that our friendship was emotionally restorative and not depleting. I miss him terribly, yet, I am really gratful to have had this friendship. You'll know when a true friendship is developing....it won't take any energy.
ReplyDeleteshall i play hard to get? naw...no one would believe it.
ReplyDeleteso you wanna see the rugger jock inside the lawyer huh? i think i might be able to work something out. i've got a great pair of woven leather braces...that's about as close as i get to leather though.
and will i get a photo in return?
cheers!
Indeed my take on things too - have never had a good male friend for fear of letting on who I really was. But now that I have begun to act on things this has changed - have gay and bi/gay married friends now who I can be totally myself to. Just a great feeling. Too bad it took my 60th birthday to do this! Now I just have to convince my wife to accept this too.
ReplyDeleteTake care
Tom from Cleveland